What You Talkin’ Bout Hammy? (#23)

Alreet wee ones?

It’s been some time since I last blogged alone. Just lately I’ve been using it as a tool to chat to people and ask some hard hitting questions much like a Michael Parkinson or Davina McCall.

But now I have been tasked with listing my top ten favourite accents (was gonna do it anyway but now I’ve been pushed). I thought it would be simple but there’s bloody loads of different accents in the world.

Who knew?

So I’m giving it a bash but you’ll have to forgive my broadness when stating a country for a favoured accent and not a region. But just assume I’m on about a popular one, much like when an American says they love the British accent they’re most probably talking about the Queen or Hugh Grant and not Sarah Millican.


10) South African

I used an image that won’t get me shot

This only became a favourite recently after I heard Bob Mortimer doing it on a podcast. It’s hysterical because he keeps cocking it up but even so it’s stuck with me.
So the good people of Johannesburg have an aging comedian from Middlesbrough to thank for my favour.


9) Recieved Pronunciation



I had to look this up! It seems this is the term for the Queens English (as I touched on above). I had no idea.

To me it’s almost the non existent accent. The base accent that everyone starts with until family and friends come along with their tainted local dialect to bugger it all up for you.


8) Liverpudlian

Never been to Liverpool, I can only assume this picture is accurate

Maybe not the STRONG Liverpool accent like Jamie Carragher or Abby Clancy (the phlegmy dolphin sounding ones) but something more subtle like Jimmy Tarbuck or Ringo Starr. The sort of tone you’d want reading you a bedtime story.


7) Yorkshire

I have been to Yorkshire. This IS accurate

Not a favourite generally. Mainly because I used to work for a Yorkshireman and he was a helmet.
But I do like listening to Ted Glen off Postman Pat say something like “Ay up Pat” or “Fucking hell Pat what time do you call this? I’ve been waiting in all morning for that delivery of anal beads”
To be fair I haven’t watched it for a while so I might have made that first quote up.


6) Australian

Which soap is this? Answer below

Growing up we always had some form of Aussie soap on in the house. Not just the big two either.
We had The Sullivan’s, Sons & Daughters, Young Doctors, E Street, Prisoner Cell Block H – you name it we had it.

Now I think of it I’m surprised I don’t have an Aussie/Bristolian hybrid spewing from my mouth. I should sound like the love child of Alf Stewart and Adge Cutler.


5) Brooklyn

Where the Beckham’s did it

This includes Rosie Perez, Leah Remi, 90% of the characters in gangster films.
The sort of accent that sounds like the owner is going to kick off at any given minute but it’s intoxicating at the same time.

Best experienced when someone from the Bronx says they’re just bustin’ your chops. That sort of thing.


4) Bristolian

Birthplace of Hamster McKenzie

I own one of these accents. I’d always considered it to be the ‘comedy accent’. It’s not hot, it’s not sophisticated, it’s just mildly funny.

That said my kids are Bristolian and they sound effing adorable so therefore it’s bumped it right up the list.
Plus, Carey Grant was Bristolian so if anyone not in the know asks, we all sound like he did in the movies. ‘Kay?


3) The South

Never watched Dukes Of Hazard. True

Not Portsmouth.

I’m talking Tennessee way. That southern U.S drawl like that of Elly May Clampett in the Beverly Hillbillies or Jessie from Toy Story.
Yeehaw etc.
Nothing to do with the Confederate though. Leave me out of that.
Also you can’t deny that Elvis sounded pretty damn special and he knocked around down there too.


2) Geordie

Gazza’s fog

Had my knowledge of a Geordie accent not stretched beyond Jimmy Nail it probably wouldn’t have made the list but thanks to loveable rogues Ant and Dec, Robson Green and Cheryl Fernandez Tweedy Cole Versini I find myself almost wishing I was brought up in the vast wastelands of the North East, drinking gravy and not wearing a coat.


1) Welsh

Looks Welsh to me

I used to have a slight dislike of the Welsh purely because of footballing reasons but now I’ve grown up and narrowed the hatred down to just Cardiff City fans (only joking Bluebirds).

But all too lately I have fallen for the Welsh accent. Largely the female Welsh accent – Rebecca Keatley, Cerys Matthews, Ruth Madoc etc.

Possibly add Tom Jones to that too.



So thats the list but theres a dishonourable mention for Essex, purely because of Gemma Collins.


Also Scottish because I just recently went off Lorraine Kelly.


So maybe you agree with this list, maybe you don’t.
Maybe you’re all crying “Hammy where’s Manchester, where’s bleedin’ Cockney?”
Well if this was a top twenty they might be in there.

Top fifty deffo.


H McKenzie




4 thoughts on “What You Talkin’ Bout Hammy? (#23)

  1. I’ll stick to what I know and say I know many “helmet” Yorkshire men and women. My brother in law repeats the same phrase daily and that is “ar much”? He uses it when questioning the price of a taxi, a pint of real ale, anything in fact that he feels is over priced, (which as his wife will tell you is everything). Other Yorkshire based annoying things are the word chimley and people who say ahh instead of yes! Having said all that my biggest cringe is seeing a Yorkshire person being interviewed on local news. All I can think is “shit do I sound like that”?
    So, do I love my accent? Nope I twattin ate it.

    Liked by 1 person

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